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Day 32 & 33: Pant-alone-tees

The store entry bell chimed as I stepped into the back of the house. There was Cap’n. She had a $5 bill in her hand. She had ol’ Abe pinched just below his nostrils. I knew because he was facing me. She waved the bill forward and backward in my direction to get my attention. It took me a second.

That bill was hot pink.

“Wow!” I said. “It’s hot pink!”

“Yeah,” she said. She smirked. “Coworker has red pantalonetees.”

Pant-alone-tees? Why would his pants matter? ‘You mean pantalones,I thought. Then I realized: he had washed the dollar in a pocket.

It was hilarious. But I didn’t laugh. I was in bullet time. The humor rushed me. The urge to correct collided with the humor. I was trying to put my money away, so that was distracting. I didn’t have a chance to laugh out loud. I’m glad, too.

I kept thinking, ‘What a funny mispronunciation. That sounds a lot like-‘

Coworker was fast. He rushed to correct her.

“Pantalonetees sounds too much like panties! Pant-alonays! Pant-alonays!” (Like “mayonnaise” on the last part.)

Cap’n repeated herself about his ownership of pantalonetees. I couldn’t help but laugh.

Yesterday was a good Monday. Made $43. Today was kind of slow. $23. But oh man. We’ve turned a corner, Amazewife and I. Paying off that credit card was a big deal.

The burnout is a big deal, too.

We had a chance to talk about it on Sunday. We’re very excited to continue the slaying of the beast. To aid in the burnout, we’ve given ourselves a raise on blow money. We get a small percentage of tips and add it to our personal spending money. She wants me to have some every time, then she gets half every other time.

My unofficial toy purchase goal is a Black Widow Chroma. It causes saliva to run out of my mouth for the following reasons (besides the fact that I can’t control saliva running out of my mouth. See being a Gardner):

  • 16.8 Million (that’s with an ‘M’ and an ‘illion’) customizable color options
  • Mechanical, 60 million keystroke lifespan switches (clicky and silent)
  • 5 Macro Keys
  • A Gaming mode option

I could write some serious words with that mess.

It was a good couple of days. Today is my pizza Friday. I have a long break. I got Friday off for the Thanksgiving dinner at Church. (Also a talent show. Ruth will be dressing up as Elsa and singing “Let It Go”. There will be many other acts. Plenty embarrassing. Some inspiring. Ruth might make me cry. )

Then Saturday it’s off to freeze our bums off at the Husker game. Sure, Wisconsin pounded our boys till you could see daylight through ‘em. But hey, it was probably because they don’t have Black Widow Chromas. We’ve got to go support them. Send them Chroma vibes. 16.8 million colors’ worth.

Well, maybe just one.




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